{"id":6716,"date":"2021-12-22T06:00:29","date_gmt":"2021-12-22T12:00:29","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/archive.onesentencepoems.com\/?p=6716"},"modified":"2021-11-28T22:14:53","modified_gmt":"2021-11-29T04:14:53","slug":"ian-willey-the-substitute","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/archive.onesentencepoems.com\/?p=6716","title":{"rendered":"Ian Willey &#8220;The Substitute&#8221;"},"content":{"rendered":"<h1><span style=\"color: #000000;\">Ian Willey<\/span><\/h1>\n<h2><span style=\"color: #800000;\">The Substitute<\/span><\/h2>\n<p>A boy raises his hand and asks<br \/>\nthe teacher how much longer<br \/>\nhe\u2019ll have to hate himself, and<br \/>\nthe teacher, unsure how to<br \/>\nrespond, reaches for the manual<br \/>\nonly to discover that the manual<br \/>\nis missing, having been replaced<br \/>\nby an old TV Guide, and so he<br \/>\nstands there, discombobulated,<br \/>\ngreen as key lime pie, scanning<br \/>\nthe blank faces before him and<br \/>\nwondering how much they know.<\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<p><span style=\"color: #800000;\"><strong>Ian Willey<\/strong><\/span><em> tries very hard not to freaking disappoint Mrs. Tate.<\/em><\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Ian Willey The Substitute A boy raises his hand and asks the teacher how much longer he\u2019ll have to hate himself, and the teacher, unsure how to respond, reaches for the manual only to discover that the manual is missing, having been replaced by an old TV Guide, and so he stands there, discombobulated, green [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1040,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"aside","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_is_tweetstorm":false,"jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","enabled":false}},"_wpscppro_dont_share_socialmedia":false,"_wpscppro_custom_social_share_image":0},"categories":[9],"tags":[328],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v21.5 - 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